"Not Good Enough"
Today I had one of those moments where my innervoice was shouting at me. I noticed this is not so unusual for me. I have long known my inner voice is strong and always knows what is best for me. Truth be told, I have not always listened, and have paid dearly when I haven't.
I'm not sure how I came by this knowing, but am truly grateful for it. What shifted today was how that voice has become so integrated into my being. There is trust there now. I trust that I know without reservation what is good for me. This is a joyous place to be!
This was all triggered by the conversation I was having with my friend. It was about clients she has been working with feeling like they're not "enough" or not "good enough". Instantly my voice yelled,"they don't receive enough" Without hesitation I relayed this to her.
Not without its problems....it makes so much sense to me how we, as humans can feel "not enough" if we haven't received enough.
Receiving can be interpreted as getting,acquiring and holding. This is not the kind of receiving that soothes the hurt inflicted by "not enough" or "not good enough". This is a deep ache. In my experience this ache is often as old as we are.
Working with clients who have never been touched, listened to with a deep loving presence is such a privilege and responsibility. We often come from origins where touch or attention is always linked to something in return: approval, reciprocity, security.
Where can touch and presence be found without condition? As I let the question land and sit next to it for a while, it strikes me, without this deep receiving, we can truly feel "not enough". If we were enough, wouldn't I be important enough to be heard?
I am incredibly grateful to have the opportunity to sit and be a loving presence for my clients. I wonder why we don't know we're enough...
I had a client recently who described himself with a large protective shell like a turtle. It took years to build this shelter from never" being enough".
I am always amazed at the courage of my clients. It is my fondest wish we all could know and believe in our own intrinsic value.
I'm not sure how I came by this knowing, but am truly grateful for it. What shifted today was how that voice has become so integrated into my being. There is trust there now. I trust that I know without reservation what is good for me. This is a joyous place to be!
This was all triggered by the conversation I was having with my friend. It was about clients she has been working with feeling like they're not "enough" or not "good enough". Instantly my voice yelled,"they don't receive enough" Without hesitation I relayed this to her.
Not without its problems....it makes so much sense to me how we, as humans can feel "not enough" if we haven't received enough.
Receiving can be interpreted as getting,acquiring and holding. This is not the kind of receiving that soothes the hurt inflicted by "not enough" or "not good enough". This is a deep ache. In my experience this ache is often as old as we are.
Working with clients who have never been touched, listened to with a deep loving presence is such a privilege and responsibility. We often come from origins where touch or attention is always linked to something in return: approval, reciprocity, security.
Where can touch and presence be found without condition? As I let the question land and sit next to it for a while, it strikes me, without this deep receiving, we can truly feel "not enough". If we were enough, wouldn't I be important enough to be heard?
I am incredibly grateful to have the opportunity to sit and be a loving presence for my clients. I wonder why we don't know we're enough...
I had a client recently who described himself with a large protective shell like a turtle. It took years to build this shelter from never" being enough".
I am always amazed at the courage of my clients. It is my fondest wish we all could know and believe in our own intrinsic value.
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